I have probably said that exact phrase 547 times over the past week. Being home for Thanksgiving brought out some of my less flattering tendencies: my need to argue and my need to be right. I was right about a family matter. I was right about how to do a yoga pose. I was right about Harry Potter trivia. I was out of control.
The reason it feels so good to be “right” is the sense of power it gives us. We feel superior in our rightness. But one of my teachers reminded me that this power isn’t real and it impedes our ability to connect meaningfully with others. She called me out with one question, “Do you want to make a case or do you want to make a connection?”
It has not been an easy question to ask myself. I am still drawn to the power in being right. It still feels good to be right. But when it comes to my family, I do want to connect which means letting go of that need to not only be “right” but to be recognized as being right. (Remember when I mentioned that Non-Attachment lesson that keeps coming around? Tada, here it is!)
I took a walk down memory lane last night to reflect on some times when I have been very wrong. I did this in a pretty light way looking at my terrible hair choices through the years. Speaking of things that are unflattering on me, let’s look at some times when I have been oh so very wrong:
Long hair don’t care
Cow licks, fly aways, general scraggliness
Rogue face framing
Highlights only in the front inspired by X-men
Cap highlights: always leave your roots showing!
Middle part in bangs
Also Sun-In spray highlights that turn your hair into straw
Ok so clearly, I am not always right. I am a human making choices based on the information I have at the moment. At that moment in 9th grade, I thought color contacts and collared shirts were high fashion. The difficulty on my latest journey will be leaving myself open to connecting with others. I have to recognize they too are humans making the best decisions they can in that moment. This might be my most challenging lesson in non-attachment yet.